"But He Looks Like A Girl!" : Some Badly Organized Thoughts on Mainstream K-pop Music & Masculinity

Oh hey. Here's something you probably thought you'd never see me writing about.

South Korean pop culture - K-pop music in particular - is a pretty huge deal in this country. By no means as dominant as North American pop culture (please do correct me if I'm wrong here) but pretty powerful and prevalent in its own right. I could round up at least 30 girls from my own high school classes who were all wildly into Super Junior back in the day. Hell, my second-year roommates at university spent most of their pre-bedtime hours curled up in blankets and giggling hysterically over something called Running Man playing on their laptop screens (I would later learn that Running Man was a variety/game show of sorts, featuring South Korean celebrities).

I've always been very much into South Korean horror movies and crime/thriller films, but it wasn't until a couple of months ago that I started paying more attention to Korean-medium channels on TV, which feature an absolute goldmine of everything hip and relevant relating to Korean pop culture. Music chart shows, popular dramas, reality tv, food and cooking programs, entertainment news bits. It started off with a mild interest in Masterchef Celebrity :Korea, before morphing into sugar rush-levels of addiction to Flower Boy Ramyun Shop, a romantic comedy-drama revolving around an awkward, hot-tempered 20-something woman, a love triangle and plenty of piping hot ramen (more on this show in the future).

But what really fascinated me was the show's titular concept of the "Flower Boy", or "beautiful boy", which is prevalent in South Korean mainstream music and dramas. One look at any male K-pop band selected at random, and it's already pretty obvious that these guys don't exactly conform to what would be typically considered the masculine "ideal".

They wear make up. They don seriously fancy, funky, fashionable clothes. They appear to have better skincare regimes than I do. Their magnificent hairstyles range from Justin Bieber-esque mops to gelled spikes to full heads of pink or green dye. They're often - but not always - clean-shaven, youthful-looking, and somewhat effeminate. And they are beautiful. They're gorgeous. Their brand of attractiveness isn't just acceptable, it's pretty much the desired ideal. They're slick and stylish, and often sport totally ripped bodies under all that designer garb. They look like a bunch of male models, straight out the pages of editorial spreads, who all just got bored one day and decided to become boy bands. This shit drives girls nuts, and I can speak from a lifetime of experience being friends with K-pop fans.

And then it happens. Someone you know, a friend or family member (in this case, my dad) decides to express an opinion that can remain unexpressed no longer ; "But why do you like this? All the men are so girly!".

I'll be honest ; the majority of the men in K-pop are not my Type, as they say. In fact, a friend once ran through a long list of South Korean male pop artists to see which ones appealed to me, and interestingly enough, it was the ones who wore the least makeup and had a generally less flashy and more conservative fashion sense. Think Siwon of Super Junior.

Now let's all sit back and take a few moments to look at Siwon of Super Junior.



hotdamn

Another South Korean male celebrity who appeals to me tremendously is actor Lee Ki-woo. Again, minimal makeup and generally less "feminine" than what you would typically find in a K-pop boy (man? guy? dude?) band.



But why do I find Siwon and Ki-woo's brand of masculinity to be more "manly" and therefore more attractive? More "manly" than what? More "manly" than who? What am I comparing their masculinity to? What the hell is "manliness" anyway? Is there a secret manly scale somewhere that no one is telling me about?

But of course. The ideal brand of masculinity in North America and in mainstream Malaysian society for the most part is not what male K-pop idols are bringing to the table. Actually, I think it's the same reason a lot of guys I know dismiss Justin Bieber with little more than a "he's so gay". Music aside, Bieber's aesthetic is quite similar to that of a K-pop male idol. He is not what is typically accepted of a Real Man. And it becomes that much easier to denigrate him with "omg gay" (homophobia!) or "ew he's totally a secret lesbian" (homophobia and misogyny! we're on a roll here!). Just for the record, there are many legitimate reasons to dislike Justin Bieber. "Because he looks/sounds like a girl" is NOT one of those reasons. Cut that shit out.

I actually think the backlash or seemingly universal derision against things like Justin Bieber, One Direction or Twilight has a great deal to do with the fact that this stuff is marketed to and widely, passionately loved and consumed by that much-mocked of all sales demographics - the teenage girl. What could be worse than associating yourself with something girls (ewww) love? There's nothing less manly than liking a girl thing! For shame! That's so gay!

But I digress ; I may have adapted somewhat to mainstream South Korean pop cultural ideals of masculinity, but it doesn't mean I've rid myself entirely of a lifetime of cultural conditioning from my own society and upbringing. Where men have to look and sound and act and move a certain way in order to be men. I try to think of any time I have used the adjectives "handsome" or "rugged" to describe a male Korean celebrity. I've used "hot" quite a few times. "Pretty", "gorgeous", "beautiful". Maybe even thrown around "hotdamnfuckingshit" once or twice.



 It's also worth keeping in mind that these guys' images are curated and maintained with almost (and sometimes literal) surgical precision - how they dress and present themselves, presumably even what colour their hair can be. K-pop music is a manufactured, big-time business. Every aspect of their image is heavily stylized and heavily commercialized. It's also important to always remember that while K-pop idols are South Korean, not all South Koreans are K-pop idols (or anything else I see on Channel M). "Flower boy" is not the only kind of masculinity that exists in that country.

K-pop's limited success in its efforts to break into the United States' mainstream pop market has also been the focus on some serious analytical dissection ; this great essay on the Gangnam Style phenomenon pins this failure down to K-pop's atypical brand of masculinity as well as longstanding stereotypes in American society and media, which have historically desexualized Asian men (Asian guys have small penis joke, anyone? Anyone?) and relegated them to the roles of nerd, clown or martial artist. None of these categories ever portray Asian/Asian-American men as attractive or sexually desirable, which is pretty much the antithesis of what K-pop stands for. Attractive, powerful, sexually assertive and desirable Asian men. Girls want to get into these guys pants. And I totally understand that now.

I UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING NOW

South Korean mainstream pop culture in general (and K-pop music in particular) is definitely making me challenge my ideas of what I find masculine, and by extension also what I find masculine enough to  be deemed attractive. I really don't understand why or how - maybe because I know so many people who are into K-pop culture - but I have come to find this stuff genuinely fascinating, and apparently other people do too ; there are entire blogs, academic journal articles, and scholarly books dedicated to examining the embodiment of masculinities in Korean popular culture and the varying levels of acceptance it meets in different societies. I'd love to have more conversations about this with long-time and/or more knowledgeable Malaysian K-pop fans.

And in the meantime I'm going to catch up with some K-pop music videos. I don't find the music all that interesting - I suspect if I understood the lyrics it would sound even more generic than I already suspect it is. It's probably not going to find any room in my music library. But you know what? It's catchy as hell. The choreography and visuals are often incredibly well done. It's slick, stylish, highly entertaining and super addictive. And basically, I can't believe I've been missing out on all this super fresh radical bangin' synchronized hot boy dancing for so long. Also there's no way you're telling me this is worse than anything mainstream US pop is currently putting out.



p.s I realize I have entirely (intentionally) left out girl K-pop bands from this discussion. I'm definitely planning to take a look at girl bands and femininity in K-pop as soon as I've actually learned more and done enough research both online and on Channel M (much of which will involve my brother singing along to Girl's Generation, so there you have it).

p.p.s Also please do call me out if I have said anything remotely inaccurate or ignorant regarding South Korean culture or its mainstream music industry. I did my homework to the best of my abilities, but you never know.